[I wouldn't have minded if he didn't acknowledge it. I can roll with that. But I didn't know how he would think he ought to handle it. People often seem to feel put on the spot, as if they are obliged to respond with something or other, when someone displays self-centralised negative emotions in their direction. And I feel like it would be presumptive and annoying of me to call him out here just to complain at him about what I don't have. Still, I'm grateful that he responded in an understanding way, rather than the usual "why would you even want to be a fighter?" I'd get from most people who mean what I do when I say "fighter". I feel accepted for what I like. So I brighten a little at his acknowledgement.]
Not everyone had the potential to accept your training, did they? Or you wouldn't have had such extensive special training, I think. [This could be simply observation. Talented, trainable students are generally paid attention to because they are receptive. As for the butterflies, I could of course have seen his paintings. I'm playing stalker-chan, remember? But he knows I know about the school, so it's an obvious guess either way.]
Oh, heh, I don't think you'd hurt me for telling people things they already know. I'm not going to tell the whole world; I'm not that clumsy. [A slightly embarrassed giggle. Because I'm hoping he thinks I am a little bit clumsy, enough that I wouldn't be hiding anything.] And really, I don't think you'd [looks him over again, instinctively] hurt me without a good reason.
[But then, I hesitate. Answering his next question is something I am afraid of, because it makes me feel vulnerable to admit that I want to be someone's friend, unless they already have encouraged me to do so. Not wanting to spend time on me is a good reason that he may well have. But I get the feeling that with Soubi, I have to say it straight out in order to interface with him.] ...Mostly, I just came out here to see if you'd mind talking a little about the way that I feel a kinship with you, despite the fact that you're capable of awesome things that I can't do. If you don't mind hanging out with me for a bit. Ummm, you... remind me a little of myself [an understatement], and that's really rare, so... [trails off, with genuine shyness]
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2012-02-29 01:43 am (UTC)Not everyone had the potential to accept your training, did they? Or you wouldn't have had such extensive special training, I think. [This could be simply observation. Talented, trainable students are generally paid attention to because they are receptive. As for the butterflies, I could of course have seen his paintings. I'm playing stalker-chan, remember? But he knows I know about the school, so it's an obvious guess either way.]
Oh, heh, I don't think you'd hurt me for telling people things they already know. I'm not going to tell the whole world; I'm not that clumsy. [A slightly embarrassed giggle. Because I'm hoping he thinks I am a little bit clumsy, enough that I wouldn't be hiding anything.] And really, I don't think you'd [looks him over again, instinctively] hurt me without a good reason.
[But then, I hesitate. Answering his next question is something I am afraid of, because it makes me feel vulnerable to admit that I want to be someone's friend, unless they already have encouraged me to do so. Not wanting to spend time on me is a good reason that he may well have. But I get the feeling that with Soubi, I have to say it straight out in order to interface with him.] ...Mostly, I just came out here to see if you'd mind talking a little about the way that I feel a kinship with you, despite the fact that you're capable of awesome things that I can't do. If you don't mind hanging out with me for a bit. Ummm, you... remind me a little of myself [an understatement], and that's really rare, so... [trails off, with genuine shyness]